Dave's Gym

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A Blog Post

Thur, Fri, Sat, Sun and Mon. Don’t Panic!

The Spanish Inquisition, talking frogs and dental floss made from Panda entrails are three things you never expect. To that list we should also add spot checks from the County Council Health and Safety Department. They lurk in the shadows waiting to pounce on unsuspecting gym businesses and want to flay your soul – just as soon as you’ve completed form 142b in triplicate. Now, I have to mention before I get carried away with the writing/lying that in my various encounters with local council bureaucrats that they have been nothing but helpful. But there is nothing like a phone call from the Health and Safety Department to scare the crap out of you.

Fortunately, we run a tight ship here at Dave’s and we didn’t really have anything to worry about. That, however, did not stop us from exploding into paranoid overdrive. Every surface was wiped with disinfectant, all the weights were scoured with detergent and the staff were dipped in a vat of bleach. Fire exits were checked, fire alarms tested, procedures were written and the staff were re-dipped in bleach. All of which took several days and a few late nights. I even came in on Saturday to do a bit of building work. Actually, that was quite a lot of fun. I came in with my eldest son, Conrad, and he helped me with the chopping, sawing and wielding of power tools. We even had a workout together, which was our first – I damn near wept.

As it turned out the Health and Safety Inspection went like a dream and the lady from the council was lovely, although Rhod did try to poison her with the worst cup of tea that has EVER been made. Bad Rhod.

I fear I’m a bad influence on my children (This Phillip Larkin poem may be all too true),

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

We went for our usual long Sunday walk across the more dangerous parts of the South Wales coastline as usual and all the kids took their own backpacks with which to stuff with rocks, bricks and the such like. I didn’t make them do it. Honest. One of my abiding memories of the walk is seeing Max, who was determined to put every rock he came across in his pack, stuck on his back unable to stand up like a turtle that had been turned over.

It was also the weekend of eating lots. I had two large roast dinners (one chicken, one beef with roast potatoes and Yorkshire Pudding), boxes of takeaway noodles, handfuls of Christmas fudge and lots of other crap. My training is going great. Unfortunately my diet is less so. I need pay closer attention to my food intake or I will never see any noticeable change in my appearance. The tricky thing is that I actually don’t care that much about how I look. At the moment my love of grub is greater then my desire to look good in a tight T-shirt. Ah well, here’s the training:

This was a cardio workout which we’re making harder by adding in ever more challenging little circuits.

This was a great workout. Rhod and I were joined by Emil and we did pretty much every big exercise you can think of.

Thanks for reading,
Dave Carter,
Dave’s Gym,
Cardiff.

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